Of gay bombs, terrorists and thieves

Monday, June 18, 2007

Interesting front page article in the Japan Times said the Pentagon allegedly considered building a non-lethal chemical bomb that could affect hormones of its victims to make them commit homosexual acts, thus destroing their battle plan and their morale. Did I hear Bobby Gates say make love, not peace? Hahaha.

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A day after a bunch of idiots calling themselves Hamas stormed government offices in Gaza Strip, killed presidential guards and Fatah officials, and declared the said terittory under their control, moderate Palestinian President Mamoud Abbas dissmissed Hamas officials and formed a new emergency government that excluded the said extremist group. The new government vowed to do all it can to resolve the Gaza problem. Since Hamas- which calls for the use of violence in pursuing its interests and for the destruction of Israel- is now excluded from the Palestinian government, aid from Israel, US and the EU would most likely be restored.

The formation of an emergency government is the perfect short-term solution. People should learn manners before they assume government positions, you know. I mean, do you think people who have killing sprees as their hobby should sit as cabinet ministers? Imagine a parliament full of AK47 assault rifle-bearing members urging their constituents to be suicide bombers. The palestinians should stop being naive. Terrorists should simply not be allowed to be part of any government. But more than firing these miserable pieces of shits, drastic measures must be enforced against them to ensure that they would be immobilized and remain so until they renounce their policy of violence, which has no place in a civilized community. Here`s a suggestion: kill them all. Afterall, f*cking virgins in their imaginary heaven is the main reason why they kill people. So why not just let them have that pleasure now so the Middle East could enjoy peace once and for all?

Or maybe just drop the gay bomb on them. Haha, interesting.

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My sister was held-up (or hold-upped in Philippine English) inside SM North Edsa last Saturday. One of the three men who surrounded her in front of National Bookstore poked a kitchen knife on her and demanded her wallet and cellphone. She lost everything, including her savings. See, security guards checking the bags of customers  entering malls are not only annoying, they are incompetent too.

In other news, the Philippine National Police said their Oplan Balik Eskuwela, which aims to prevent crimes committed against youngsters during the back-to-school season, is generally successful.

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THEFT ATTENTION! LET`S MANAGE VALUABLES FOR MYSELF, says this signboard in one manga cafe in central Tokyo. Hahaha.

What`s wrong with a Yasukuni visit?

Monday, June 11, 2007

  

Lee Teng Hui- the former president of Taiwan who was educated in Japan, speaks Japanese, says he admires Japanese culture and finds the Chinese culture unimpressive even though he is ethnic Chinese- visited the Yakusuni Shrine during the culmination of his trip to Japan where he called for strengthening of the alliance between Tokyo and Taipei (never mind that there`s no such alliance in the first place, because Japan and Taiwan doesn`t have diplomatic ties).

His visit to the said shrine made the blood pressures of Chinese leaders skyrocket. But he says there`s nothing wrong with the visit, because it was just a personal tribute to his brother who was killed while fighting for Japan during World War II and who is currently enshrined in the said temple.

Indeed, what`s wrong with the visit? Yasukuni is just an ordinary temple, that honors war criminals! It is just a place of worship, with a museum that insists Japan fought a noble war, not an agressive one! It is just a serene landmark, whose caretakers insist that the only thing regretable about the war is the fact that Japan lost! And Lee was just there to pay homage to his deceased brother, who is believed to have raped and killed scores of innocent Filipino civilians during the orgy of violence and torture known as the Battle of Manila! What`s wrong with it?! Somebody please tell me!

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Friends can indeed be bought.

I have a lot of experience with friends who betray me for their convenience. Most of those times, the betrayal is unexpected and at best disappointing. But the thing is, such cases do happen in international relations, too.

Costa Rica yesterday broke off relations with the Republic of China (Taiwan) to establish ties with the People`s Republic of China. That narrows the number of states recognizing Taiwan from 25 to 24. These 24 states recognize Taipei as the legitimate government of China, but analysts and common sense state that more of these countries would betray the Taiwanese pretty soon. Gambia is the only African country still recognizing Taiwan, but China is spending billions for African development and it would not take a long time to pressure the said country into abandoning Taipei. The countries of Central America, too, are expected to follow Costa Rica amidst big investment from Beiijing, since the said country is the oldest friend of Taiwan (if his best friend betrayed him, why would I stick with him?). Another pro-Taipei state is Vatican City, but Beiijing continues to hold hostage the Catholic Church in the mainland, demanding severing of ties with Taiwan as ransom. The rest of the countries that still recognize Taiwan are the small island-nations of the Pacific Ocean who are so insignificant most people don`t even know they exist as states.

And the reason behind Costa Rica`s desertion? Money, what else. And it could not be more garapal when President Oscar Arias said: `I expect that this decision will bring prosperity and development to the people of Costa Rica.` China gives more aid to that country more than Taiwan do.

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My five best (and/or worse) news features for the week, in no particular order:

MORE LIES. Gloria Arroyo said Pope Benedict is so up-to-date with Philippine affairs that he knows how superb the recent performance of the economy is. She also said the German Sheperd praised her for economic development and for her reforms. She also said the Pope admired his way of asking Congress to abolich death penalty. She also said the Pope said a lot of things, mostly praises for her. How miraculous for an old, slow-speaking Pope to say all those things in ten minutes! Clearly, His Holliness and Her Bullshitness didn`t waste time on pleasantries during their quickie meeting.

TRILLANES AND PIMENTEL remains on the 11th and 12th spot after the counting of the Lanao vote. But their fate is still to be decided by the vote in Maguindanao where Chavit Singson topped the race while all 12 TU candidates won during the initial count. Meanwhile, the administration says it prays Zubiri would still make it. We all know what happens whenever the administration prays for something.

ORAL ARGUMENT. Lawyers are expected to clash in a court battle on the appeal of a teenage boy who was handed a ten-year prison term in Georgia, US for having consensual oral sex with a teenage girl. I guess it would be a very hot excercise.

HOLY TRANSGRESSION. On the way to Brazil, Pope Benedict XVI forgot his passport. He wasn`t denied entry, but his airliner, Alitalia, was fined for `bringing undocumented aliens` to Brazil.

AGAIN, ABOUT THE POPE. A drunk German guy jumped through the barricade and tried to ride with the pope`s car, grabbing the metal bar in the vehicle`s rear and attempting to climb to its top, where the pope was obliviously waving to the crowds. The man was wrestled down later by papal bodyguards.